August 23, 2012
It’s been a peculiar few days at SGTMT HQ. Firstly I was amusingly likened to Gerald Ratner. Then, in an unrelated incident, a dad of a band we blogged emailed us. Sweet. He was warm, friendly and all in all seemed like a good bean. Or so we first thought… What happened next will I’m sure be recounted by my solicitor in a court of law, and I already intend for it to feature prominently in chapter 7 of my autobiography (volume 2 of course).
So, want to hear what happened next? What do you mean you don’t? Well, chum, it’s my blog so there. Lump it square. Anyway, so; I emailed the dad in question and thanked him for his email. I also made mention of his kind email to our millions of Twitter followers. He then replied as thus:
Yes, I am reliably informed that I am xxxxxx’s dad, but now that I’ve told you that, I regret to say I will have to hunt you down and terminate your career with extreme prejudice.
To make matters even worse, he continued on to make a rather disparaging remark about the Post Office. I know, I know. Who does this guy think he is? First he threatens me with ‘termination’ and THEN he abuses The Post Office? How could he? OUR Post Office, the bright beacon of Postal expertise which is the envy of dozens of minor war torn, third world countries. Disgraceful.
I can tell you, these remarks prompted much consternation and some measure of sadness at SGTMT HQ. Tom cried (I know this happens a lot but he’s only 4’11 and get’s bullied a lot), Luke left in a huff and Tim wet himself whilst covering his nude body with first class stamps and pledging allegiance to the Postal operatives who never fail us and paint everything golden.
Drama, drama, drama. To calm us all down we cuddled on the sofa and tuned in to the latest release from Welsh trio The Joy Formidable. It’s sublime. Enjoy:
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